Monday, December 7, 2009

I Need Finishitis

So, I'm a good starter of projects, but not such a great finisher. This goes for almost everything, not just knitting. I don't know why I'm so bad at it. I've got dozens of craft projects that I have various bits done, but they just languish for extended periods of time, sometimes they never get done. I've been a terrible procrastinator, pretty much my entire life, and I've always gotten myself in trouble because of it. I've just never gotten any better. I just don't have a whole lot of motivation or drive, even if it is something I love. It's always both surprising and rewarding for me when I actually do finish something, like my scuba instructor certification. I just hope I follow through on teaching, I spent a lot of money on it!! I mean, that's of course not my only motivation, I have such a strong passion for diving, there's almost nothing else in the world that I love more than diving. And I know that I will be a good instructor because of that. It's just follow through that I seem to lack. I always have ideas, but rarely do I do anything with them, or I don't finish what I start. Somehow, I did manage to finish college, with a degree in fine art, but I don't use my degree. I mean, knitting counts towards using my artistic abilities, but, I don't paint, or draw anymore, and I get to museums and galleries increasingly rarely. It makes me sad sometimes. Before diving, art was my main passion. I still love it, but I've fallen into complacency and I'm inherently lazy, and lack in my follow through. I've got a good paying job, and my company provides good health insurance for both my husband and I, so, in this economic environment, it's hard to give that up. Especially since Jeff is self-employed and insurance is either impossible to get or prohibitively expensive. Hmm, such is life.
Anyway, sorry for such a morose entry. It started out teasingly that I have a ton of knitting WIPs, and went to a psychoanalysis on myself. Eh, it happens.

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